What I really think
Posted by Alli on March 18, 2008
We got home Sunday afternoon and have been trying to put things in our lives back together. Specifically, I have been crushed by laundry, irritated by cleansers, and laughing with my son. As hard as I tried before we left, I didn’t have my house in order and it is starting to grate on my nerves.
But really, who needs another post on how disorganized I feel? I could go on about how tired I am (part post-vacation blues and part PMS), but I don’t wanna.
All day yesterday I was trying to form a blog entry in my head but I just didn’t know how to write it without sounding like a jerk or people being bored with what is probably old news right now. So this morning I decided I should just put it out there and then move on:
When we were in the Georgia Dome and were waiting and waiting for information on what had happened during the “severe weather” I was really, really scared. I was trembling with a fear I have never felt in my life.
I saw families gathered on the concourse, sitting with sleeping children, waiting for news on the tournament and weather, and I wanted to cry. Because of the way my mind works, I keep thinking about worst case scenarios and wondering what we would have done as a family. Sometimes I start to feel my heart race and a heaviness on my chest and know panic is about to set in, so I start to breathe deep and find a focal point like Fuller’s hair or smile.
If panic sets in really badly, I do something strange (I think). I look for pictures of destruction and stories from people who were really in the thick of it. People who did see the worst case scenario, and have their lives altered a lot more than the silly inconvenience of not seeing anymore basketball games.
Saturday was surreal for us because we didn’t feel safe driving back to Chattanooga and didn’t really get to finish our tournament experience like we wanted to. But, as time goes on, I feel really bad for saying things like “our vacation was ruined.”
I recognize I was scared and am probably a little scarred by it, but I have to move on and know in my heart how blessed I was to be where I was at the time the tornado struck Atlanta. God protected me, my family, and others in the Georgia Dome. And that is what my focal point should really be.
And now, I move on (or try to) because I have an appointment.
[tags]SEC Tournament, Atlanta Tornado, Georgia Dome[/tags]
gracie said,
I thank God with you that you and your family were safe Alli.
Joanna said,
Aww, I would have been really scared, too. Glad you and your family are okay!!
Deb said,
those are moments that we’ll go back and reflect on all our lives…
Glad your safe, and yes, it will forever change you, because it was a traumatic event for you
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