It’s just different
Posted by Alli on October 15, 2007
There have been a lot of announcements in the blogosphere and in our circle of friends recently regarding expanding families. Unfortunately we will not be one of those families, probably won’t be any time soon.
I keep trying to keep my head in a good space about this topic but I keep slipping up and finding myself spiraling downward into unhappiness or avoiding situations where people with more than one child gather. This was a tactic I used when we were having issues trying to get just one child. I would avoid all situations where children were involved, especially the events with babies.
I am happy for these bloggy friends and IRL friends, I really am. I just have a hard time saying, “Congrats!” while pushing back tears and wondering why it isn’t us yet. I keep telling myself I can’t get crazy like I did the last time, but as the cycles keep starting over I keep finding it harder and harder to keep the crazy at bay.
Infertility sucked the first time… and the second go around isn’t any easier. It’s just a different kind of suck.
There.
I said it.
[tags]infertility, secondary infertility[/tags]
bobw said,
thanks for being willing to share this. I’m not sure what to say, but I’ll be praying, and I for one hope you dont “avoid”.
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